The Five Fears Keeping You Stuck (and how to get past them)
Here's a pattern I've noticed across every type of coaching I do:
Whether someone wants to start a business, switch careers, train for their first ultra, leave a relationship, or finally have that difficult conversation—the same five fears show up.
Not similar fears. The exact same ones.
The personal training client who says they're "not ready" to start strength training yet? Same fear as the entrepreneur who needs "one more certification" before launching. Same fear as the runner who's been "thinking about" signing up for that race for three years.
It's the Readiness Trap. And it's just one of five universal fears that keep us playing small.
I've spent the last decade helping people take leaps—from the gym floor to the boardroom to the trails—and these five fears are the pattern underneath almost every stuck point.
Here's the thing: These fears don't go away. You don't eliminate them. You learn to move with them.
So let's break them down.
Fear #1: "I'm Not Ready Yet" (The Readiness Trap)
What it sounds like:
"I need more training first"
"I should learn more before I start"
"Other people are more qualified"
"Maybe next year when I have more experience"
Where I see this:
The entrepreneur who takes course after course but never launches
The runner who's been "thinking about" hiring a coach for two years
The professional who's been "preparing" for that career conversation for six months
The person who's been "researching" the move they want to make instead of actually moving
The truth: That voice saying you're not ready? It's actually a good sign. It means you care about quality. But here's the problem—you don't learn by preparing endlessly. You learn by doing.
Even if you're just one step ahead of someone, you're qualified to help them with that step. Your "lack of experience" might actually make you more relatable.
The reframe: "I'm ready enough to start learning by doing."
Fear #2: "What Will People Think?" (The Judgment Trap)
What it sounds like:
"What if people think I'm being arrogant?"
"What if my friends don't get it?"
"What if I fail publicly?"
"What if someone criticizes my approach?"
Where I see this:
The person who won't post about their business because former colleagues might see
The runner who won't join the group run because "what if I'm too slow?"
The professional who won't apply for the stretch role because "what will my boss think?"
Anyone who dims their light to avoid standing out
The truth: Most people are so focused on their own lives they're barely paying attention to yours. And the ones who do judge? They're usually projecting their own fears onto you. Your courage triggers their discomfort with their own inaction.
The people who are FOR you will find you. The people who aren't won't. And that's actually perfect, because you're not building a life for everyone.
The reframe: "My courage might inspire someone else. The right people will find me."
Fear #3: "I Don't Know How to Handle [X]" (The Practical Overwhelm Trap)
What it sounds like:
"I don't know how to set up an LLC"
"What about taxes and insurance?"
"I don't understand the technology"
"What if I mess up the details?"
Where I see this:
The entrepreneur who uses "getting systems set up" as an excuse to avoid putting themselves out there
The person who won't start the side project because they "don't know how to build a website"
Anyone who's been "planning" for months but not executing
The truth: I used this excuse myself for months. Then I gave myself ONE day to handle the essentials. LLC filing. Basic bookkeeping. Contract template. Done.
You know what? It took hours, not months. And getting those foundations in place actually freed me to do my real work.
No one knows everything before they start. You figure it out as you go. And most of this stuff is simpler than you think.
The reframe: "I can learn what I need to know, when I need to know it. Systems free me to do my best work."
Fear #4: "There Won't Be Enough" (The Scarcity Trap)
What it sounds like:
"The market is saturated"
"There are already so many people doing this"
"What if no one wants what I offer?"
"What if there's not enough to go around?"
Where I see this:
The coach who won't launch because "there are already too many coaches"
The professional who won't go for the promotion because someone else "deserves it more"
Anyone who believes someone else's success means less for them
The truth: Your unique combination of experience, personality, approach, and story means you'll resonate with people that others won't. Your "competition" can't be you.
When you operate from abundance instead of scarcity, opportunities start showing up. Collaborations happen. Referrals come. The right people find you.
The reframe: "My unique approach will resonate with the right people. There's enough for everyone, including me."
Fear #5: "I Can't Trust Myself to Figure It Out" (The Self-Trust Trap)
What it sounds like:
"What if I can't handle what comes up?"
"What if I make the wrong decision?"
"What if I fail and prove I was never capable?"
Where I see this: This is the root fear underneath all the others. It's the voice that says: "When things get hard (and they will), I won't be able to handle it."
The truth: Every hard thing you've ever figured out is evidence that you can figure out the next hard thing.
You've learned new jobs. Navigated relationships. Solved complex problems. Adapted to change. You've already proven you can figure things out.
Self-trust isn't built by waiting until you feel confident. It's built by taking action before you feel ready, and then watching yourself figure it out.
The reframe: "I've figured out hard things before, and I'll figure this out too. Action builds trust."
So What Do You Do With These Fears?
Here's what doesn't work: Waiting for them to go away. They won't.
Here's what does work: Moving with them.
You acknowledge:
"Yes, I'm scared I'm not ready. AND I'm going to start anyway."
"Yes, some people might judge me. AND I'm going to do it anyway."
"Yes, I don't know everything. AND I'll figure it out."
"Yes, there's competition. AND there's room for me too."
"Yes, this is uncertain. AND I trust myself to handle what comes."
Your Micro-Experiment
Pick ONE tiny action you've been avoiding because of one of these fears. Just one. And do it this week.
Send that message. Sign up for that thing. Post about your idea. Book that call. Register that business name. Have that conversation.
You don't have to feel ready. You just have to take action.
Want to go deeper? I've created a free guide called "The 5 Fears Keeping You From Starting" with reflection prompts for each fear. [Download it here].
And if you're ready for support in moving through these fears—whether it's in your career, business, or life—I work with multi-passionate professionals who are done playing small.
Find out more about The Next Big Bet Coaching Method.
